*sigh*…I seem to be a noticing an evolution of my posts (DID YOU SEE THAT GEORGIA??? I SAID EVOLUTION! EVOLUTION, EVOLUTION, EVOLUTION).

I’m getting bitter. Is it my age? Maybe. But I’m more inclined to blame the increasing numbers of complete moron assholes…or morholes…in the world around me. I hate you all so very, very much.

I was originally planning on having another “Separated at Birth” post. I couldn’t help but draw “wild hair” comparisons between Saddam Hussein (at the time of capture) and James Brown (at the time of his recent arrest). But then I decided I would be insulting the Godfather of Soul, and I really didn’t want to do that.

But in the process of looking for Saddam photos, I came across this site: La Voz de Aztlan, or, How I Grew Up to Be a Conspiracy Theorist and Hate the Country That Allows Me to Have This Website….whichever.

The link that drew me in was a story claiming the Saddam capture as a hoax. Look at how nicely they used Photoshop to draw the arrows to the meat and dates! And such irrefutable evidence from sources I’m sure exist and know what they’re talking about!

Well, as you can imagine, I had to look for more! They are obviously “in the know.” I got roped into an article entitled: “New York to be Nuked on Feb. 2“, complete with another Photoshop masterpiece. My favorite part of the story:
“It is heartening to see that more and more Americans are finally awakening to the fact that there are sinister forces within the government taking their orders from an ‘International Cabal’. ”

Gah! I’ve spent more time on these people then they deserve.

So, the entire state of Georgia is considering banning the word “evolution” from schools. They won’t stop the teaching of “biological changes over time”, but just want to get rid of the word….a word they are referring to as a “buzz word.”

Honey (that would be Superintendent Kathy Cox), get out your dictionary. The word “evolution” is older than “buzz word”. It’s not a “trendy or stylish” word..it’s a word and a concept that has been used by educators and professionals for a hell of a long time.

The fact that you and your backwater-hick-close minded-ultra religious-fuckhead-conservative-asshole friends and supporters think that taking away the term will take away the concept, just shows that you have no right to have any say in the education of young people. You’re just teaching them to be as ignorant as you are.

Oh yeah! Ronnie James Dio for president!

Don’t forget that Ronnie is angry about “…the unchecked proliferation of evil women and dragons in America today.” Now that’s a platform I can get behind.

Especially when pulled into a work scenario that I can only use the term “goat rodeo” to describe - as has been the case since late last week - my drive in to work each day is the closest thing I get to zen time. This is not because suburban Chicago traffic is so pleasant to navigate, but it is instead because of the 20GB mp3 player installed in the trunk of my car.

Today’s theme, though, would strike me as a bad omen (if I was the sort of person that believed that an mp3 player was trying to tell me something):

• Jeane, The Smiths
(”I don’t know what happiness means/But I look in your eyes and I know/That it isn’t there”)
• Only Happy When it Rains, Garbage
(”You can keep me company as long as you don’t care”)
• Lose That Girl, St. Etienne
(”She said ‘cancel everything’/And like a fool/You never know what’s happening”)
• Here’s Where the Story Ends, The Sundays
(”And whoever would have thought/That the books that you wrote/Were all I loved you for?”)
• Roads, Portishead
(”I got nobody on my side/And surely that ain’t right”)
• I Know It’s Over, The Smiths
(”I know it’s over/And yet it never really began/But in my heart/It was so REAL”)

My interpretation of my mp3 player’s subliminal message? It’s a toss up between the fortune cookie-esque “You are about to be unlucky in love” to the slightly more pragmatic “You were very angst-y in the late ’80s and early ’90s”.

Sorry to be so blunt in the subject line, but I am beyond pissed off. I’m not sure if any of you followed the story of the Representative from South Dakota, Bill Janklow, who was convicted of second-degree manslaughter, speeding, running a stop sign and reckless driving.

One day he was driving at least 70 in a 55 mph zone, when he blew off a stop sign and killed a motorcyclist. He has had 13 traffic citations since 1990. After his convictions, he was sentenced to 100 days in a county jail. A county jail. 100 days. What a ridiculous sentence for someone who killed a man, and obviously has problems following traffic laws. Oh, and it will all be struck from his record if he completes his probation without incident.

Now you might argue that losing his seat was punishment enough. Please. Imagine if it was just a “regular” guy who committed these crimes. Being a Representative is a job, not a piece of armor.

I would be insulted if I was Randolph Scott’s family. They deserved better justice.

And I can’t help but notice how the guy Randolph Scott was riding with testified for the defense and was surprised at the “large amount” of jail time Janklow received. Gee, I wonder who got to him.

Some interesting anthropology news for Desiree - the Canadian Institute of Archaeology and the Greek Archaeological Service are looking for the remains of a 20,000-man Persian fleet that sunk on its way to Greece in 492 BC.

The new portable from Nintendo - codenamed Nintendo DS - has some intriguing gameplay possibilities, but I’m concerned about it being more of a gimmick than anything else… I guess I’m having a hard time envisioning just how this thing will work.

I should have, but still couldn’t believe the crap I’ve been reading about MikeRoweSoft.com.

Microsoft is *suing* a high school student because of his domain name, which is also his real name (Mike Rowe). They say:
1) People will get confused if they get to his site…i.e. we’re all so stupid we think that the Microsoft we see EVERYWHERE could also be spelled MikeRoweSoft.
2) He uses his site to sell his web design business. So we idiots, having stumbled on the site, will forget that Microsoft doesn’t actually create webpages for people. No other communication with Mike Rowe will tip us off that he isn’t a huge software monopoly in Washington, and we’ll give MikeRoweSoft money unintentionally…money Microsoft, and not a high school senior getting ready for college, surely needs.

And, can you believe it…they offered him $10 for the domain! No shit he was insulted. It costs more to register the damn thing. I would have told them to shove it too (and I would have asked for more money).

Mike Rowe…sorry you have to go through this crap at your age, but hopefully you’ll get something out of it.

…or “why Desiree wishes she was home right now”:

I think this article still doesn’t quite get it right, but at least it’s a start. I think that the term “geek” has had a positive connotation for some time. So saying a “typical Internet user” equals not a geek because he/she is socially active and involved in non-computer activities equals a cool person doesn’t say anything about being a geek.

To me, it’s: “typical Internet/computer user” equals geek because he/she is into computers AND IS ALSO socially active and involved in non-computer activities equals a cool person.

I’m a geek and I’m proud, damn it.

But I’m probably not making any sense….